Grammar Ma’am, Glad You’re Here

I don’t have many peeves.  I really don’t. 

I don’t care if you wear brown and black together.  Heck, I do that too.  Even Oprah does that.  I don’t care if you talk with your mouth full, as long as I don’t have to look at it it.  My table manners are hardly going to make the Etiquette Channel either.  I don’t care if your cats pee in my yard.  Seriously, it might improve things.  Have you seen my yard? 

But I do have one very specific peeve.  Yes, I do.  Do you want to know what it is?  Well, do you?  

I’ll tell you then –  it’s the repeated misuse of “your” and “you’re”.  It makes my teeth itch, my eyes water, and my stomach feel all rumbly.  If there’s one thing I can’t stomach, it’s a “your” where a “you’re” ought to be.  So for the first and last time, I’ll break it down for you:

“You’re” is a contraction of “you are.”  And “your” is not. 

(You’re welcome)

Look, I realize there are bigger fish to fry.  I really do.  There’s pollution.  There’s predjudice.  There’s big dogs and little dogs playing together in public dog parks.  But I am not talking about the occasional typo here.  I am not even talking about starting a sentence with a conjunction to make a point.  I am talking about a  plot for the mis-use of your to take over the english language.  And possibly the planet!  Maybe the whole universe!  It must be stopped!

So, let’s practice, shall we?

“Is that your sweater?”

“Yes, it’s my freakin’ sweater, why else would I be wearing it?  You’re going to drive me crazy!”

See?  Easy!  Now, you try it!

And that’s all I have to say about that.  Unless you are writing “then” when you should be writing “than”  Because then, we are going to have a serious talk.

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5 thoughts on “Grammar Ma’am, Glad You’re Here

  1. Danielle

    I have this same peeve, but “they’re” “their” and “there” gets to me too. I’m less freaky about “it’s” and “its.” Now feel free to watch my grammar like a hawk on FB, I’m askin’ for it.

    1. Oh, I am definitely “asking for it” too! : )

      I don’t think this would bother me if it were an occasional error, or if I knew a couple of people who did it, but it’s so pervasive. That said, I am the queen of turning plural nouns into possessive nouns, and inserting commas, for no good reason…

      I also know someone whose peeve is the unnecessary use of “…”

      We’ve all got ’em, I suppose!

  2. rjjs8878

    I have the same pet peeve too. You would not believe how many educated people I work with don’t know the difference between your and you’re. It just drives me nuts. Didn’t these people pay attention in school? There is also one person who always gets then and than wrong too.
    By the way, you can wear brown and black together. It just needs to done correctly. Let one be the dominate color and the other the supporting color

    1. I know – I sometimes use the wrong “to/two/too” but it’s not because I don’t know better. It’s because sometimes my brain and hands have a disconnect. It’s when it happens EVERY time that you know there is an issue!

      And I’ll keep the fashion advice in mind. I think I might get to go to Old Navy tomorrow for some new clothes…it still applies to Old Navy clothes, right? : )

    2. And by the way, my brown and black combos usually come about from an internal monologue that goes something like this:
      “Um, I have a black shirt clean. I have brown pants clean. Oh well….” : )

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